Yesterday I went to dance to the African drummers in Parc Ciudadela. A lady, who was a bit unhinged, was agresively heckling people into dancing. "Come on, move that body! That's why Europe is dying, because we don't mooooove", she would get into people's faces and repeat this over and over to different people and in different permutations.
I told her: "that's not how you invite people to dance, you just dance and people will join you". She ignored my words, and kept on heckling a poor couple who were visibly uncomfortable. I got between them and I tried dancing with her, but she looked over my shoulder still screaming things to the young couple.
Finally I told her: ma'am, you are coaxing these people to dance, and I'm right here in front of you inviting you to dance but you are refusing me. "That's because I'm speaking to them", she replied. "I'm inviting you to dance, do you say yes or no?" and finally she shook whatever was on her mind and we begun dancing.
Strangely enough, the guy who was heckled came in and joined us. His girlfriend remained in a corner, smiling. The lady started motioning her to join us, I took her hand and told her "let me take you to your husband", she smiled and walked with me to dance all together.
The couple were shy dancing at first, and the lady was not helping with her encouragement. I just smiled and let myself flow, we all got into a groove and after a while of loosening up, I saw the couple dancing sexily with each other, without any inhibitions.
It's by being free that you invite other people to express their freedom. And yet, without the heckler this beautiful couple would have not danced. The heckler and the pacifier are both expressions of a larger life-force, within us and outside of us.