10am at work
I've been thinking lately: for many women, a good physique on a man is what a financially well-off woman is to a man. It's a nice-to-have and what is apparently a perk will sometimes work against them. Many men, when they are attracted to a woman with brand clothes or luxury accessories they will think "expensive" and feel insecure. Many women, when attracted to a man with a good physique they will think "vain" and face the same insecurity.
Many years ago I got involved with a friend. She said to me "you know, even though it's nice that you're in shape, women like to be in better shape than their man", to which I replied, I hope not too rudely "Yes, men like that too". Assuming she was rich, I could have said "you know, even though it's nice that you have money, men like to be in better financial position than their women" to which she would have answered "yes, women like that too".
...
I'm back at home at 20:38. Writing in Eurpean "military time" is more convenient, I'll try to acquire the habit. After work I went to yoga class with a wonderful teacher at a new studio I signed up for. The other studio is very good but 70 euros more expensive and I can only practice vinyasa at 07:00, and if I don't make it my punishment is Bikram at 20:00 (on weekdays).
I'm high by this time, of course, but it's mild. I should record myself but I feel lethargic, I'm tired, but I don't want the same thing that happened yesterday in which I lay down and went to sleep. I was hungry when I arrived, but it was dispelled by the smoke. My apetite will come back in a while.
I shall put on some music.
I'mmmm this incel is trying to curate a sexy playlist. Something that can be set for the start of seduction down to the cuddling section. Horny man's imagination and knowledge and appreciation of music is very poor. If music were a D&D skill, I estimate I'd hover in the retarded 5-7 points. I feel I don't trust Gemini and I will give it a chance, but not today. Let's take my intimacy to...
Claude, please give me a list with the major AI players and order them by popularity
Ok, I'd like to try Grok for my raunchy stuff. Seems like a good fit anyways.
I want to create a playlist for seduction, it must start with chill music and ramp up in intensity, with some valleys to manage the intensity for a two hour skin to skin session, where the last 20 minutes are dedicated to cuddling. At the start, assume 20min of kissing and light touching. After that, things spice up to set us on fire gradually.
I don't want to influence you with my own musical preferences, but it be clearly should have rhythm. It should also be raunchy, I find most "sex" playlists quite boring. Explicitness and the right rhythm at the right time will make or break this playlist. Thanks Grok.
I revised the first part of the list seriously and then gave feedback:
Warm up:
- Usher - Nice & Slow [I like, keep]
- Kelly Rowland - Motivation ft. Lil Wayne [not bad but ramps up too fast, probably remove]
- Sabrina Claudio - Belong to You [exquisite, move to the top]
- Miguel - Adorn [at first I was like "whatever a filler it's ok", but I went into imagination and found it's a solid recommendation]
- Beyoncé - Rocket [too slow and didn't like, but we also need chic songs so I'll keep an eye for things where she can express].
Ramp-Up: Spicing Things Up (20-60 min)
- Chris Brown - T.K.O. (The Knock Out) [halucinating or pranking me Grok? Such song does not exist and is probably a meme regarding his beating of Rihanna. I had to Google all that just now when I couldn't find it on Apple Music].
- Rihanna - Cockiness (Love It) [this is crazy good, but it's better towards the end]
- Lil Wayne - Py Monster* [ugh terrible remove]
- Offset - Lick [wtf] [a song about the ghetto, you're mad Grok]
- John Legend - Tonight [Grok suggested a valley here, but it's happy music, not a good break].
- Trey Songz - Neighbors Know My Name [sings great but he gets on my nerves, something more soothing].
- Cardi B - Clout ft. Offset [I notice Grok is being US centric].
Grok: please take into consideration my comments. I rather than hip hop, suggest raunchy latin reggaeton or urban music in Spanish. Not everything, but spice with latin seasoning.
Of course it made spice the main ingredient. Sigh. I asked it to generate Apple Music links, they don't work. I give up on Grok for this. Let's take this problem to our pal Claude Sonnet (couldn't generate Apple Music links, though I acknowledge it's admirable that it knows it's limits):
Sade - Kiss of Life [This song I don't like but smooth operator... nice]. Maxwell - Whenever Wherever Whatever [ugh sounds like a disney thing] ...
Struggled to find things I liked from Claude, interesting. My patience is working thin and I only have about 50 minutes of unordered music. Soon enough I guess I won't have to copy and paste, I've squandered much of my time finding the music. I did upload Claude's suggestions to an online conversion service but it's not worth bothering the share? Nah the link was two clicks away. Let's put a cover,
it's raunchy, let's go to Grok:
Can you generate an image of the midsection of an attractive woman tummy. Her private parts are covered by the logo of claude.
Content Moderated. Try a different idea.
Of course, this is something AI should refuse to generate, there's various reasons why this is justified, I'll do it myself. Done. I do not think the cover image will appear publicly, it could get flagged for being too raunchy.
My prompt to myself is this:
Create a square image with the photo of a beautiful woman's hips covered by the logo of Claude, hinting the logo at her vulva. Do it in such a way that is tasteful and doesn't entice censorship, but explore the limit, don't stay safe.
Thinking...
I've searched on google for women's hips and they indeed look beautiful, but they have this stock photo appearance and not sufficient sex appeal.
Let us investigate in our training data, I remember in my... early twenties? I liked this Hegre Art Model called Mona. Let's search for her... Ah, stunning. Mark in his twenties had great taste. Why is it that our sexual stimulation has become so... high dopamine? But we also stop waging war against it, descale the war so to speak. To return to the start is not a bad omen, on the contrary. Mystical words to say that—in a while, I will do the unspeakable.
Ah but it's Friday night, you're making a lovemaking playlist, and you're planning to go to bed to make love to the image of a woman on the screen. That's more or less where I'm at. I feel I'm going through a healthy if awkward recuperation from this dopamine addiction, but exploring it publicly is so awkward and difficult to do.
I recall distinctly the question: if you died tomorrow after saying goodbye to everyone, would there be anything you regret not doing? I read it years ago and I thought: "No, I wouldn't regret anything, I've lived a life varied in experience, I would die with no regrets of the past or of the future". However, at this time I know the answer has changed. I would regret not sharing through my body how sexual healing is incarnated. I write this from the position of an incel, ironically, because I have not yet surpassed whatever excuse I put to myself. A friend in Barcelona told me: "dude, if you can't fuck with that body in Barcelona, you're surely an autist".
I know the answer of this is holistic, it's not a matter of getting laid, it's a matter of getting out of this self-absortion that besets me, perhaps moreso when I smoke. These are clouds that pass, you're up in your head, at the opposite end of sensuality. Let's put on the playlist I compiled with songs I liked. A miserly 55 mins of playtime. Who am I kidding: I'm more worried it's too long.
It's time to log off, I'll go for a walk.