I was about to begin to write and a WhatsApp message interrupted me. Let us address the matter and come back to write. It was my friend saying I forgot a card at his house. He sent me pictures. It was a business card with some requirements for my graduation photos. I decided to tell the truth: it was useless, but thank you very much. Most people avoid the it was useless because it makes people feel they've wasted their time, but we're talking my best friend here and I consider that between true friends only truth can mediate.
He said well, it could be that you're keeping her card to call her and I said actually I hadn't thought about that, let me google her and then I made the mistake of grabbing the picture of the first person who appeared with that name and posting it to the group. I say mistake, because I got the wrong person, there is nothing inherently wrong in the event.
The fact that I am justifying myself by logic implies admission of at least questioning one's actions, for these times are throughly confusing and stating that one has shared the picture of a woman in a group of males is setting oneself up for public lynching.
Let us imagine the case where the woman whom I found was to my romantic apetite. I would have posted her picture (out of truthfulness) and I would have handled the jeering. I would have contacted her. After this it would be up to fate.
Is this true? I really do think so. There is one of way of verifying this truth practice: find out the real woman behind the name. Let us see her...
I come back some 30 minutes later, unable to find a single photo of her. It's fine. If things don't flow this way, they will flow in some other way.
And so many thing remain unanswered, don't you think? Was this all bravado? Is 30 minutes enough to search for somebody without falling into what society considers creepy? Is all this very machista?
And I feel a certain delight in rewriting the last paragraph. I put some meditation bullshit, but then understood it was a way of walking away of the problem, since I am actually getting hungry, and I find myself unwilling to answer the questions that I arose. Let us resist the temptation to cook, and continue with the task of reasoning.
Was this all bravado?
I admit to feeling relief when I couldn't find her, because sticking to the principle of truthfulness, if I had liked her I would need to tell her the truth: "My friend found your business card and I googled you and I liked you. Are you single?". That requires some serious balls. I would have had to liked her a lot, but I would do it, yes. It was not bravado.
Is 30 minutes enough to search for somebody without falling into what society considers creepy?
What society thinks is irrelevant. Minutes, days or years searching for somebody is irrelevant until the intention is known.
Is all this very machista?
Why should I be concerned.
Enough, let's prepare lunch.