So many things to catch up on! It becomes increasingly difficult to write down everything relevant that happens in my life. As a hoarder of experiences I sit down to jot down whatever I can before it evaporates.
On Thursday I met up with Javier Cañada. He was the person I was most looking forward to seeing again in Madrid. I said many things which I regretted later, and I also left many things unsaid which I regretted later. May our next meeting leave no regrets, Javier. I really appreciate your readership and support over the years.
On the weekend I attended a psychology and spirituality conference. I pained through probably half of the conferences, I have a distaste for a certain kind of spiritual non-sense but I don't even know how to explain it. Probably a whiff of veiled virtue signaling.
One of the presentations, however, blew my mind. A lady called Maria Toscano spoke about the relationship between design, beauty, spirituality and architecture. It's a bridge I've been searching for years to no avail, and she laid out the groundwork for something I could extend in the future. Even though it seemed personally relevant, at the end of the presentation the presenter said "wow, half of the attendants have tears in their eyes". I was surprised to realize my cheeks were wet. I hadn't noticed.
Whatever qualms I may have had about the conference were nullified by this presentation.
I spent the weekend with the friend whom has become a lover. I said to her "I write out my life in public, but I know you are a very private person". She said "as long as you don't mention who I am, it's OK". I said "in a romantic relationship there must be intimacy. Most things will remain between you and me".
On Sunday we attended a MeetUp event where we discuss TED Talks. One of the videos we had seen seven years ago, but the host had forgotten about it and thus we were discussing it again. The video was about luck, and the TED presenter argued that he was very lucky at meeting his wife, who he met at a party and turned out to be a wonderful wife.
The host asked if this was really luck.
I said "You asked exactly the same question seven years ago". He said "Do you remember what you answered". I said "yes, if he hadn't met his wonderful wife, I think he would have met another wonderful woman, he doesn't seem to be the kind of person who dates toxic women. He's a renown psychologist, he probably possesses more than ordinary emotional intelligence and he is wise".
The host then asked "Well that was seven years ago, is there anything in your opinion that has changed since then?".
I said: "well, wisdom or emotional intelligence might not save you from a toxic or a poor relationship. Our families sometimes instill in us wrong ideas about love, coping mechanisms for dysfunctional individuals, and then we repeat these patterns with the people who we love because we feel comfortable there. We must heal or patch our relationships with our family so that we don't repeat the patterns that have happened there, often across generations".
People seemed to agree with what I said. One added "yes, but we are not victims of our families. As soon as we notice these patterns we are able to free from them". "Yes, that's were the healing starts", another one added.
If in seven years Ángel forgets about this video and we discuss it again, I will say "this is the third time we are discussing this". Then he will ask me how I have changed my mind, and I hope to say: "It was the will of God almighty. As Xenophon's Socrates said 'By all means marry: if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher'. We only become unhappy by resisting to the plan that was laid before us".